Sunday, December 18, 2005

HAIZ... dunno wat to write...always is i to write then no free time to write..then now is gt time liao...can't think of waT TO write...haiz...christmas is around de corner..to be truthful ah...i think my gor has getting longer n longer liao..haha...further n further to be exact...every1 also...genie mei n claud mei also...hock gor also...haiz...every1 need their own free space..like wat mr liew says, "every1 has their own comfort zone..."...n they will live in their zone 4 most of the time...n came out once or occasionly to "visit" their frens...haha...(18/12/2005)...today ah...1 wk be4 christmas..i still can't forget her..dunno y...haiz..y every1 muz lose their impt pps..juz to allow thm to realise de impt of this "pps"...haiz...he is now on msn..but to be honest...nt that close as last wk whn this time (23:50)..i will still sms him abt eveything lo...now is like...dunno leh...like the feelings slowly slowly gone liao..n same 4 my ex-classmates...on msn or everywhr in sch de...few mths of mis-contact..means alot alot de...ya.."last time we used to"...i think this is every1..everys'porean de fav phrase ba..."long long ago..we used to"..this kind of baa baa thingy..ya...dunno la...wat shall i say leh...every1 to everypp gt 1 kind of "freshness"...n this so called "chemistry"...inside both bodies(dun think negative)...then once this so call "linkege" is gone or loss...anyw...to me...."zhi yao cheng jing yong you jiu hao liao"...i dun bothers abt lifelong thingy la...like frenshp...every1 rite "Frens4ever"...but will frens be ever 4ever..i have doubt in it...haiz...if is everlasting..then also won't 'close fren"....onli "normal frens4ever"...ya..marriage also..dunno la..i dun feel like marry some1...i loved..or shall i say..will i ever meet a gal i like n she like me..n we can treasure this relationshp within years n get a family n live in...dunno leh...i juz dun think i will be able to do that...haiz...i juz simple dun hv courage to do it la...dunno leh...maybe haven't reach that stage...so won't think too much or too deep into it..ya...i seems dun feel that 2006 will be a good yr ahead..n won't look 4ward to..haiz...i feel so lonely...this loneiness i spread to me within this few months liao...haiz...i am still regret if i didn't ACCEPT YUWEI DE STEAD-MENT...WILL I STILL CAN HV THIS CHANCE TO SPEND CHRISTMAS WIF HER NOW N EXCHANGE SMS-ES...haiz...2mths 26daes to exchange for 2 yrs 26hrs de normal frenshp...will it worth it...haiz...i dun think so..rite 4 now..i also dun think she will look back liao...haiz...THERE ARE TOO MUCH SADNESS AROUND ME LIAO..haiz..i dun think i will to be able to bring over it..really...i dun feel i have this "great mind strength"...that i can pull over it...hope she is now having great time wif him ba...really 1 t osend my blessings to her...but i scared once i send her my sms...her sadness will be back...dunno la...i dun 1 to think liao..or shall i say i dun this strength to think 2 much liao...i am tired...i need a long break..i dun wish sch start too early..i still hv many hws to do..i dun 1 to do...juz can't afford to do...haiz..i dunno wat to do la..i think i juz rest my body on my bed now ba...coz tml still need to go k...k all my feelings off...but won't de..the most...tml happi..then back liao..those sadness..aiya..really 1 to say sorry gor..i can't pei u whn u are bored...i noe u 1 sum 1 to accompany u..n share ur feelings to u...i noe u hv free incoming..but i juz can't pluck my courage to tok to u...or shall i say...i dunno i will be abl to start a topic or nt...anyw...hope a gal in jc will help u forget everythin sad ba..but i dun think u will be able to forget her easily..like wat i am facing now..n u are facing now...jia you ba kb gor...mi always here in s'pore to help n pray n hope u will have a better better best life...nitez...:'(

frens4ever
@ |12:13 PM|

*Fellow Bloggers *

-Jimmy
-Jeanne
-Genie
-yunting
-claudia
-Kaibin
-yhock
-sheena
-yuwei
-samuel
-james
-stefie
-li wen
-alex
-becca